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Esquire。　She　remembered　that　day　clearly　enough；　it　would　take　more　than　three

years　to　forget　it。　She　had　almost　thrown　the　envelope　away；　thinking　it　was　a

subscription　offer。　Opening　it；　she　had　found　instead　that　it　was　a　letter

saying　that　Esquire　would　like　to　use　Jacks　story　〃Concerning　the　Black　Holes〃

early　the　following　year。　They　would　pay　nine　hundred　dollars；　not　on

publication　but　on　acceptance。　That　was　nearly　half　a　years　take　typing　papers

and　she　had　flown　to　the　telephone；　leaving　Danny　in　his　high　chair　to　goggle

ically　after　her；　his　face　lathered　with　creamed　peas　and　beef　puree。

Jack　had　arrived　from　the　university　forty…five　minutes　later；　the　Buick

weighted　down　with　seven　friends　and　a　keg　of　beer。　After　a　ceremonial　toast

（Wendy　also　had　a　glass；　although　she　ordinarily　had　no　taste　for　beer）；　Jack

had　signed　the　acceptance　letter；　put　it　in　the　return　envelope；　and　went　down

the　block　to　drop　it　in　the　letter　box。　When　he　came　back　he　stood　gravely　in

the　door　and　said；　〃Veni；　vidi；　vici。〃　There　were　cheers　and　applause。　When　the

keg　was　empty　at　eleven　that　night；　Jack　and　the　only　two　others　who　were　still

ambulatory　went　on　to　hit　a　few　bars。

She　had　gotten　him　aside　in　the　downstairs　hallway。　The　other　two　were　already

out　in　the　car；　drunkenly　singing　the　New　Hampshire　fight　song。　Jack　was　down　on

one　knee；　owlishly　fumbling　with　the　lacings　of　his　moccasins。

〃Jack；〃　she　said；　〃you　shouldnt。　You　cant　even　tie　your　shoes；　let　alone

drive。〃

He　stood　up　and　put　his　hands　calmly　on　her　shoulders。　〃Tonight　I　could　fly　to

the　moon　if　I　wanted　to。〃

〃No；〃　she　said。　〃Not　for　all　the　Esquire　stories　in　the　world。〃

〃Ill　be　home　early。〃

But　he　hadnt　been　home　until　four　in　the　morning；　stumbling　and　mumbling　his

way　up　the　stairs；　waking　Danny　up　when　he　came　in。　He　had　tried　to　soothe　the

baby　and　dropped　him　on　the　floor。　Wendy　had　rushed　out；　thinking　of　what　her

mother　would　think　if　she　saw　the　bruise　before　she　thought　of　anything　else　—

God　help　her；　God　help　them　both　—　and　then　picked　Danny　up；　sat　in　the　rocking

chair　with　him；　soothed　him。　She　had　been　thinking　of　her　mother　for　most　of　the

five　hours　Jack　had　been　gone；　her　mothers　prophecy　that　Jack　would　never　e

to　anything。　Big　ideas；　her　mother　had　said。　Sure。　The　welfare　lines　are　full　of

educated　fools　with　big　ideas。　Did　the　Esquire　story　make　her　mother　wrong　or

right？　Winnifred；　youre　not　holding　that　baby　right。　Give　him　to　me。　And　was

she　not　holding　her　husband　right？　Why　else　would　he　take　his　joy　out　of　the

house？　A　helpless　kind　of　terror　had　risen　up　in　her　and　it　never　occurred　to

her　that　he　had　gone　out　for　reasons　that　had　nothing　to　do　with　her。

〃Congratulations；〃　she　said；　rocking　Danny　—　he　was　almost　asleep　again。　〃Maybe

you　gave　him　a　concussion。〃

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